By Erin Anderson
Posted in Africa Yoga Project Blog, on August 26, 2013
I HAVE A CHOICE
There are numerous choices and decisions in my life that I have had and need to make, all of them bearing different consequences on me and the people closest to me. In level two of my yoga teacher training, my teacher Baron let me in on a very deep perspective from which to look at things. He left me a theory he called, “the drama triangle”.
VICTIM (GOOD GUY)
PERSECUTOR (BAD GUY) SAVIOR (RESCUER)
In this drama triangle nobody gets out. Everybody becomes something at some point or another. The victim turns to be the persecutor/prosecutor, the persecutor becomes the victim and the rescuer joins the victim to become the persecutor. I have found myself in this triangle many times in my life without noticing it. For most of you who have had the pleasure of visiting, living or simply being close to the slums and the ram shackled shanties in Kenya, you might find it easy to relate to my story when I say; I have blamed my lack of success to limited resources and environment.
By complaining I became the victim of my circumstances and of course I told stories to friends who become my sympathizers and therefore my rescuers. I blamed the government and or my parents making them the bad guys and in this case the persecutors. In the long run I the victim end up prosecuting the government and or the parents making them the eventual victims as I took their position to become the persecutor together with my rescuers/ sympathizers. What I needed to understand is that there is absolutely no way out of this vicious cycle, “the drama triangle”. The best thing therefore would be not to get entangled in the first place. When I sympathize and agree with someone else’s story it is disempowering them and in the process get myself involved in this unending, hopeless vicious cycle of blame game. I have blamed many things and many people in my life as it is, but I have woken up to the realization that this is just my story. My description of what I think is happening or happened. Now I have a choice not to buy into my own story and to concentrate on facts which will leave me with; what happened and………nothing else. Exactly; NOTHING ELSE! Now this is a good place to start.
Here I have:
• Endless possibilities
• Creativity or creative force
These are open chances that will enable me to grow into a whole new me without attachments to my definition of what might have happened (my story). My story remains to be just a story and I choose not to suffer on the basis of an interpretation I have given to what happened.
The meaning I give to the facts makes me fall victim to the plight of blindness. I fail to see the immense resources around me that could easily take me to my greatest heights of success. I am blind to the chances and opportunities around me that could scale me up the ladder of achievement. I want to learn to start from within, where I stand and not to move an inch until I have fully and completely exploited the chances around me. This I will know when I have outgrown my space and opportunities will show up if and when I am ready for them. I have hope, I have a choice.